Is It ok to be Positive All the time| Positivity VS Negativity

 Is it OK to be  Positive Every Time.

No Is Also a Just Reply To Your feelings, so must reply.

You might hear once or a twice (may be a lot of time) that "Be Positive".

If you search on the web the ways to be positive you will get hundred or thousands articles but instead of it if you search the ways to be negative then you will find few people  who are considering it first step to the solution. 

Its the fact we are not highlighting the negative aspects of our personality. We are negative biased. We just want to keep our dark aspects under the carpet. 

Most Common Saying

• If you have some kind of failure in your life, be positive keep trying you will be succeed next time. 

• If you lost someone in your life, don't morn on it have patience, be positive.

• If someone scolded you, be positive take it as a guidance to not repeat the same mistake again.

• If someone criticize you, take it in a positive way, it is for your betterment.

These statements clearly depict that we are not ready to talk we are just avoiding the reality. Its like that if you have a pain in body be positive you are still breathing, but don't exaggerate it. I am not saying its a bad thing. We should be positive, have patience. But their should be a limit to this also. We as a human have a right to be " Negative " for sometime. Negativity is also an emotion like positivity. So emotions should be expressed not repressed, otherwise repressed emotions will be distressing latter in life. You have to equipped yourself for future by showing your emotions. But it should not be exceeded from certain limit of time. 

Researchers said that negative thoughts damage your brain. Which lead various mental problem like depression, anxiety, self-pity. But it is also a reality that to reach to the solution you have to complete the stage of acceptance where you will accept your thoughts. Here you are allowed to cry, to have self pity, you have right to play  blame game. 

Then after certain time period remind your self OK enough, let's go for a solution, if my these thoughts, and actions are constructing me or just ruining me in return, analyze.

For self awareness you can use mindfulness as a meditation.

Mindfulness.

We should except our emotions. We should be negative, let's set the reminder that we will be negative for only ten minutes every day (perfect time is night time).  In this way we will come to know about our grey expects, our weak points, and our own opinion about the event happen to us. 

Mindfulness is the best therapy to do when you are feeling low. In mindfulness technique you have to observe your thought patterns like an outsider, or like your own critique. Think about your thought patterns either these are positive or negative.

Now the question is how you will find your thoughts are positive or negative. So the answer is if your believes are negative about you, about your environment, then these are negative thoughts.

In mindfulness technique you are your own critique analyze your thoughts as an outsider make your self understand that You have these negative thoughts. 

Ask yourself from where  these thoughts came? What were signals which make you to think in this way? Are these thoughts are on the basis of reality or just you perceive in this way? 

When you get the answer that Your negative thought patterns are because of the some specific environmental clues then analyze that clues look from different aspects either that clues are right or wrong if you find the reality then go for a solution to fix these areas. And you all know that when we know about the problem, its root cause then we will comes up with the best solution.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

The Next step is when you know the root cause of a problem, then change your perception towards that stimuli. The rule of thumb is think opposite of negative thoughts. Like you couldn't get a job and  you are saying that those people are corrupt, they take money and then give job. Now this is negative pattern. Don't suppress it. Go search or read again the requirements of the job who will  get this job, what the qualification and experience requirements are what the skills are mentioned for qualifier. Then become your own judge, analyze yourself either you have these qualities or not. If not change your thoughts your believes and send message to your brain I will learn all these skills and I will apply again. And hence in this way your brain will start processing in the right direction.

 By mindfulness technique and by cognitive behavioural therapy you can make the thought diary and you can write down your thought patterns both positive and negative.

Final Words 

We shouldn't be negatively bias we should well come our all emotions. Repression and denial is not the solution, for a short time you will get rid of anxiety but in long race you will lose.

Use different techniques like mindfulness, Thought diary, CBT, , Self awareness to be familiar with your inner self. Then change  your thoughts according to the reality. 

I always recommend treat your self like a baby. Guide your self to the right way as an outsider. Send positive messages (again base on the reality) to the brain. Self Compassion or self love  is the best solution to come out of the dark hole.